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Friday, April 27, 2012

We get! You're the MAP! Now shut up already!

"I'm the map. I'm the map. I'm the map. I'm the MAP!"

If you have a child who is 17 or younger, chances are you've been subjected to Dora Hell at some point or other. Amanda is 17 now and Dora was just starting and gaining popularity when she was about 5 so she watched it but only for a brief (although it felt like an eternity) amount of time. It was annoying then and it hasn't changed in the 12 years that have passed since she watched it.

After suffering through the repetitive annoyingness that is Dora when Amanda was little, I vowed that I'd never let any of my kids watch it. Most kid shows are annoying to some extent but Dora takes the cake and I didn't want to have to watch it. I did okay with Ben and managed to avoid it until recently. Somehow, Jillian discovered Dora and it was love at first "Hola!" Ben decided he liked Dora as well.

Poor me. Now I spend my days trying to decide which would be more painful...watching Dora or inserting small wooden spikes under each of my toenails...Listening to that effing map or having to walk barefoot through a mixture of broken glass, rusty nails and hot coals.

It's torture I tell you! Torture! If the government wants to get confessions out of terrorists they should make them watch Dora 24 hours a day until they crack. I watched 3 episodes this morning and I was resisting the urge to call my mom and confess every bad thing I had ever done if she would just make Dora go away!

I'll bet you're thinking "But you're the adult...surely you control the remote and you can just turn Dora off and move on to something else." Oh how I wish it were that easy. I tried it today.

This was the result.

Don't they look like they've lost everything that they've ever loved? Jillian will cry for an hour for "Gora and Boops (that would be Dora and Boots for those of you who don't speak toddler). She'll have a full on, throw herself on the floor, crying, kicking, screaming tantrum. One glimpse of Dora and she's happy again.

Jillian is a bit behind in speech and has been receiving speech therapy for almost a year now. Dora has encouraged her to speak more than anyone else so I guess she isn't all bad.

My parents had to put up with the annoying crap that my brother and I liked when we were kids so I guess this is my payback!

2 comments:

Krista Eger said...

Hahaha this cracks me up! I actually really like Dora. I am not positive as to why because I totally get why you'd hate it. I think it brings me back to a magical time that was childhood for me...but don't get me wrong, this wasn't around when I was child or anything (I'm not THAT young haha!). It's a combination of things. Some kids shows just rub you wronger than others (like my grammar?).
I'm sure you've read or seen my recent facebook posts about Audrey and YGG. I love that show (as I've been open about in the past) but it is literally the ONLY show Audrey would watch. Yeah I'm the adult and I have control, but is it worth the tears and emotional breakdown every time something else is played? Nope! Hahaha! For me, I'd give anything to watch just ONE episode of Dora. It seems like there was a time where I was watching so much Dora I would have given anything for a little Gabba! Any kid show in excess is NO BUENO!! :D
On another note, I'm noticing Audrey is behind in speech too. She's being evaluated next month. Nate never had a problem with speech, just understanding language concepts so he's also getting evaluated. It will be interesting to see how it goes. I can't wait to hear what goes on in Audrey's brain! haha! Love little kids and their funny thoughts!

Susan said...

Krista,
That's exactly it. It'd be nice to just watch a different show for once without tears and a meltdown (her meltdown not mine). Dora wouldn't be so bad if she wasn't so loud and repetitive!

It's good that Audrey is being evaluated. I'm not sure if things are different there than here but our Early Intervention program is amazing. They do birth-3 years so in just over 6 months Jillian will age out. I know she won't qualify at that point because she is already talking a lot now, she's just not up to where she should be. She understands everything and is learning on level or above level for everything but the speech is behind. I love hearing her little voice more now though.