My Dirty Little Secret

I have a crush on Eminem. There I said it. I'm not even a fan of rap music but when he's rapping I'll listen. I don't know what it is about him. I'll go hang my head in shame now.

Mommy Jobs

Mom's have more jobs and more responsibilities than any other job that I can think of. There are some that I love and consider a true blessing to be able to perform. Then there are the others. The ones that I dread doing. I know for some moms that's changing diapers so they play the "whoever smells it changes it" game with their partner. I know for some other it's getting up in the middle of the night so they'll pretend to sleep through the baby crying hoping that their partner will get up and get the baby. Neither of those things really bother me. I'm not one that you'll hear complaining about getting up in the middle of night unless it's been one of those nights where I haven't really gotten any sleep.

Mom Jobs that I Love

*Bathtime-I don't usually give Ben a bath any more because Jeremy does that but I'm the one who gives the baby a bath. I love it because she gives me big happy smiles while she's in the tub. She rarely cries in there and seems to enjoy. Plus she smells so good when she gets out!

*Breastfeeding-It's difficult sometimes and there are days that I want to give up but I really do love the close contact and bonding. I grew her for 9 months and I like that my life is still able to sustain hers even though she is now separate from me.

*Reading/Learning/Playing-I love reading books to the kids. I've always loved to read and I hope that they will take after me in that aspect. I love teaching them new things and playing with them.

*Comforting-I don't like when they're sick but I do love the extra love and nurturing I can give them during that time. When Ben is sick he always wants to snuggle and I love that.

Mommy Jobs that I Hate

*Cutting fingernails/toenails-Oh man I hate this with a passion. When they are really young their nails are so small that it seems like with one little slip you could cut off an entire finger. Plus they wiggle and it's hard to snip a moving target. Then they get older like Ben and fight you about it. I have to tackle him to the floor, sit on, pin his hand to the floor and cut those nails, then pin the other arm down and do those. It's like a wrestling match.

*Taking them to the Doctor for shots-This one is pretty self explanatory. What mom likes to see their baby in pain and crying? Not to mention that now there is so much controversy over what is in those shots and what potential problems they could cause.

*Cleaning diaper explosions-Most diapers don't even phase me anymore and I don't really mind changing them. However, there are those few explosive diapers that I wish I could run away from! They're the ones that require clothes to be washed and for the baby to be hosed off in the shower! Yuck!

Snow

I hate it. I really really do. I'll admit that it does look pretty. Today we all took a nap. I put Jillian in her bouncy seat and I laid on the couch and fell asleep in about 5 seconds. Jeremy went to lay Ben down for his nap and they fell asleep together. After a while Jillian woke up to eat and I fed her. My back was to the window so I hadn't looked out. Jeremy and Ben woke up and Jeremy saw that it had snowed while we slept. Ben went to the window and said "oh wow!" He was impressed. Mommy was not.

With having 2 kids I already often feel trapped in the house especially during the week days when Jeremy is working. It's so hard and a lot of work to get myself and a 2 1/2 year old and 2 1/2 month old out the door by myself. If I take them shopping Ben sits in the seat and Jillian's carrier goes in the basket which leaves me no room to buy anything! So we rarely go out unless Jeremy is home to help.

The snow makes the feeling of being trapped even worse. Taking 2 kids out is hard taking 2 kids out in the snow is even worse. Added to that is the nervousness that I feel while driving in those conditions with my kids in the car. Of course now it figures that it seems to snow only on the weekends. This is a weekend when Jeremy isn't on call so it's our freedom weekend and it's freaking snowing! I've been pretty much trapped in the house for over a week because we've all been sick and down comes the stupid snow.

Hopefully, they will have it nicely cleared in the morning so we can go out for a bit. I really need to get out of the house. I'd like to run to the grocery store for a few things. I had been hoping to go out shopping with my best friend but I don't think that's going to happen now.

Stupid snow.

The Neti Pot

The Neti Pot is a wonderful and yet disgusting little invention. At first glance it appears to be a child's plastic teapot. Well after it's been used in the proper manner I'm not sure you'd want your little girl serving "tea" from that thing.

As I've mentioned in several previous posts I've been sick. My head has been so clogged that I can hardly think straight. A few nights ago I was telling my mom how terrible I felt and being the wonderful mom that she is she went to the store and purchased the Neti Pot for me.

I was desperate so I was willing to try it. I knew it involved putting water up your nose so I was nervous because....well who the heck likes the feeling of water going up their nose? I read the directions and prepared the Neti Pot. You put some warm water in the pot and add a packet of this solution stuff and shake it up. Then you're supposed to lean forward and put the spout up to one nostril while your head is tilted slightly to the other side. The water then flows through the nasal cavity and flushes everything out and runs out the other nostril. Then you repeat on the other side.

I made Jeremy leave the room. I'd like to leave a little romance in our marriage. He's seen me puke and give birth. I figured seeing me flush the copious amounts of snot from my nose was better left to his imagination. I stood at the sink working up the courage to do it. I finally took a deep breath and went for it. It took a bit for it to work because my nose was so stuffy but then it worked. Oh glorious relief!

I'll spare you the details on what came out but let's just say I wouldn't be surprised if remainders of the bath bead that I shoved up there around 1985 was finally flushed out! So if you ever find yourself in a similar miserable situation give the Neti Pot a shot.

Thanks Mom!

Facial explosion

Okay I'm really sick of being sick. I've had colds before and sure it sucks but usually after 2-3 days I feel better and I can usually function even through the worst of it. This time I'd say I want to crawl in my bed and stay there but that would make the pain even worse.

My head and face are so sore and congested that reclining even the least bit hurts even more. I also have congestion in my chest so I cough and cough driving myself nuts. I can hardly sleep because the facial/head pressure and the coughing/gagging keep me awake.

I can't remember ever feeling this sick before. I've had a fever and chills and last night my heart was racing. The Dr prescribed some antibiotics a few days ago but I'm still not better. I've been sick for over a week now. I don't know what else to do.

Alright I'm done whining now. Jillian is asleep again so maybe I'll try to sleep for a bit too.

Drug testing welfare recipients

Over the last few days I've seen some people on FB join the group "Making drug tests required to get welfare."

To tell you the truth I used to feel that way and a few years ago I may have joined the very same group. Over the last few years though my point of view has changed. I think a large part of it was from working in an elementary school in a low income district. Many of the students there came from families who were on welfare. Many of them also had drug and/or alcohol addicted parents.

For the first time it really occurred to me that withholding welfare from a person who is addicted to drugs isn't just hurting that person it's also hurting their children. What I wish more than anything is that these children didn't have drug addicted parents but unfortunately that's not the case. The kids shouldn't be punished for their parents wrong doing. They have no control over their environment. They're basically prisoners in their situation until they are either old enough to get out or until things finally become bad enough that someone finally comes along to rescue them. Unfortunately, many kids live in those borderline type families where things are bad but not bad enough for an overloaded child protective system to take them away.

It sounds easy to say "well child services should remove them from the home." It's not that easy. You remove them and then what? Send them into an already overwhelmed system? Bounce them from foster home to foster home where the situation may not be any better than what they were take away from? Put them in some type of orphanage that will also cost the government a ton of money? It would be cheaper to just give the family the welfare money in the first place and possibly extend free counseling and help for the addiction.

I'd like to see more help offered instead of less. Maybe then the cycles of poverty, drug addiction and abuse can finally be broken. I really don't understand why we as a society turn our backs on those who need it most.

When Mommy is sick

It really really sucks. Being sick is never fun obviously but it's even harder when you have little kids. They don't understand that Mom's head is about to explode and all she wants to do is sleep. All they know is that they want to be fed, cuddled and played with.

I've been sick for almost a week and I'm tired of it. I was feeling even worse today and luckily my wonderful parents took Ben for the day. I don't know what I'd do without them. Since the baby is sick too she slept quite a bit so every time she went to sleep I went to sleep.

I finally got some antibiotics. Drs are very stingy with them these days so they didn't give them to me before. But after a week of just feeling worse I guess the Dr gave in. Hopefully, it will work.

Right now there is so much pressure in my head I think my face may explode. I have a stupid fever and alternate back and forth between being really hot and being really cold. I hope by tomorrow the baby and I will both be feeling better. As bad as I feel I hate seeing her sick even more. She's sleeping next to me right now and she keeps waking up coughing. All I really want to do is make her feel better. Right now she looks so sweet and peaceful. It's amazing how quickly you fall in love with your children. I could just stare at her for hours.

Ben seems to be quite a bit better today. He's still coughing but it's much better than it had been. He spent the day with his grandparents and had a meltdown when he had to come home. I think he likes them more than us. That could be because they spoil him rotten!

Something Funny in Walgreens

I had to go to Walgreens to fill Jillian's prescription. While I waited I wandered around the store. I went down the aisle with baby stuff and checked things out. Then I turned to look at the other side of the same aisle. What do you think they were selling there? Condoms! I laughed out loud! Condoms on one side and baby stuff on the other. Is that their subtle way of telling the consumer that their condoms are ineffective or is it to serve a friendly reminder that if you decide not to buy the condoms you'll probably end up shopping on the other side of the aisle? Either way it made me laugh and I had to share. Guess whoever set up the aisles in there also had a sense of humor.

In not so funny news....

I'm still sick and I puked in poor Ben's bed tonight. I read him a story and laid with him to try to get him to sleep. I kept coughing and so did he. One nasty coughing fit hit me so I sat up and WHAMMO puke city. Luckily it missed Ben. However, it hit his cute little car sheets and my shirt and pants. Lovely. Tomorrow will be a better day. Right?

A visit to the Doctor times 3

Well we're all still sick so with the help of my wonderful mom we went to the Dr. Turns out Ben and I basically just have to ride it out until this crap leaves our systems and we feel better. Jillian has her very first ear infection so it's antibiotics for her. That should be fun.

Ben does seem to be feeling a bit better. He is actually playing with his cars right now which is something he hasn't done much for the last few days. He also ate and stole a sip of my iced tea. He tried to be all sneaky about it. Apparently, my 2 year old thinks his mom isn't on to him. He's lucky he's cute. That's why he gets away with so much.

Jillian has been sleeping most of the day which I'm sure means she's planning to keep me up all night. It's okay though as long as the sleeping is making her feel better. That's all I'm really worried about right now.

I'd really like to kick the butt of the person who passed on their lovely germs. It was a kid from Ben's class. His mom knew he was sick and sent him in anyway because she didn't want to give up her "me time." Hello lady there is no such thing as "me time" when you become a mom. I'm satisfied with being able to go to the bathroom alone. Taking a shower with no one bugging is like a mini vacation. Most days though I have to decide "should I wash my hair today or shave my legs?" There's rarely time for both. Luckily it's winter right now so my beastly legs can wait. Anyway...back to my point....if your kid is sick keep him home. It's great to teach your kids to share but that shouldn't include sharing germs.

Well Ben is ready to play Memory now. He dumped every single card on the floor. I think watching me pick them up and reorganize them is his favorite part of the game.

I give up

The kids and I have been sick for the last few days. Ben seemed to be quite a bit better today until he tried to go to sleep. He coughed a lot but finally fell asleep. Poor Jillian kept trying to sleep but she could hardly breathe. So I performed one of my least favorite mommy jobs. I suctioned out her nose. I bought a new little gadget today. It's a battery operated boogie sucker! Awesome! Or you know...not. It worked. She hated it and screamed her poor little head off but it worked. For a few seconds I was afraid she was going to do an Exorcist headspin but we got through it. I finally got her back to sleep and I laid down on the couch (I can sit up more there so I can breathe better) to try to get some sleep. I immediately start coughing and gagging. As I lay there contemplating sticking that fantastic new super powered boogie sucker up my own nose kidlet #1 woke up coughing and crying "mama mama." I went to his room and tried to get him to take a drink. He refused and contined to cough like crazy. I rubbed his back, smoothed his hair and tried to get him to calm down. I finally bundled him in a blanket and took him outside like the Dr suggested. Supposedly, the cold air can help. Well guess what? Even though it's January it's not cold tonight. Figures. The only thing I got out of going outside in the middle of the night was a wet sock. Oh yeah...it's raining.

I brought Ben back to bed where he proceeded to cough and cough and well you get the point. As I slathered him with Vicks (despite his protests) Jeremy finally woke up or finally gave up on pretending to be asleep and came out to help. Ben was fed up with my torture so he was glad to see his Daddy. They curled up together and within minutes Ben was fast asleep. I figure it's like a jar lid you can't get open and then someone else comes along and gets it open right away. I laid the ground work so Jeremy could get him to sleep so easily.

I got back on the couch and got on the computer for a bit because by this point my nose was running like a faucet and I figured there was no point in laying down. I'm really tired of being sick now. That boogie sucking machine is mighty tempting. If I never blog again it's probably because I gave in and tried it and ended up sucking my brain right out.

Idiots who think we shouldn't help Haiti

I enjoy Facebook. It's a cool way to keep up with friends and family without...you know....actually having to see them! It's much easier to ignore someone on Facebook than it is to ignore them in person or during a phone conversation. There's always that convenient little red button up at the top of the screen that offers me the escape from whichever person happens to be annoying me that day. If you know me you know that someone usually annoys me on a daily basis. I'm easily annoyed what can I say?

Anyway, there is occasionally a post from some random person or other that annoys me enough that I find it impossible to ignore. Lately, it's been the postings about Haiti. I've seen this one more than once and it honestly makes me want to reach through the computer screen and choke the offender who posted it.

"Shame on you America: the only country where we have homeless without shelter, children going to bed without eating, elderly going without needed meds, and mentally ill without treatment - yet we have a benefit for the people of Haiti on 12 TV stations. 99% of people won't have the guts to copy and repost this."

Shame on you America? Really? The help that we've provided to Haiti (and to other countries who have previously been devasted by natural disaster) is part of what makes me proud to be an American. Of course things aren't perfect in our own country. No matter who is in office, no matter how hard we try there will always be problems. Yes, there are hungry people, yes there are homeless people, and yes our current health system sucks beyond belief. But that doesn't mean that we shouldn't help other people. Does the person who originally wrote this really believe that we are the only country that has homeless, starving, and/or medically untreated/under treated people who aired this telethon? Umm hello moron....lots of countries aired this telethon and you can bet your behind that in each and every one of those countries there are people who are homeless, starving or lacking in medical care. I wonder if those other countries have people there who are so unwilling to hope like there are here.

By this logic you shouldn't help anyone else unless things are completely perfect in your own life. If everyone went by that "logic" no one would help anyone else ever! Sure there are plenty of things I wish were better in my own life but when I sit down and think about it I realize how damn lucky I am. I have 2 beautiful children, an amazing husband, a great family and wonderful friends. That right there is much more than many people have. So why shouldn't I help when I can?

What do people who don't want to help expect the people of Haiti to do? We're talking about a country the size of Maryland that, prior to the earthquake, had over 300,000 orphans and over 50% of their population is under the age of 18. Do these people expect all of the litle orphans to rise up and rebuild their country or do would the rather see the entire country die out? This isn't something that they can ever recover from on their own. There were likely over 100,000 people killed in that earthquake. Do you get that? 100,000 people!

What people also seem to ignore is the fact that Haiti sent $36,000 to the United States in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. While that may not sound like a lot of money you have to take into consideration that it came from the poorest country in the western hemispere where most people live on less that $2 a day. Even most of our poor live on more than that.

These people are hurt, starving, and dying. How can we deny them help? Can you honestly look at the footage of the wreckage there, the pictures of people frantically trying to dig out their loved ones, pictures of children crying in the streets, the news coverage showing dead bodies strewn about the streets and really deny these people help?

I'd really like to ask the people who have posted this FB quote what they have done for the Americans that they say need so much help. My guess would be a big fat nothing. Some of them probably don't even bother to vote. The most they can do is sit around whining about the state of our nation. To those people I say get up off your own ass and do something about it.

Dear Anyone Who Is Actually Reading This,

Welcome to my blog! Maybe you're here because you're are a friend or relative and you feel obligated to read, maybe you're here because you love me lots and hope that this blog will give you a new perspective on the inner workings of my mind or maybe you're here because you're the weirdo type who takes their lap top to the bathroom and you need some bathroom reading material either way I hope you enjoy reading here. Oh and if you're the type who is reading while sitting on "The Throne" please keep that little tidbit to yourself. There are somethings the people of the interwebs do NOT need to know.

I can guarantee what you'll be reading here will be a lot of ranting. There are so many things to rant about in this world full of incredibly stupid people. I also plan on bragging about my genius children (the baby may only be 2 months old but I know there's a genius trapped in that little body) and the amazingly cute and wonderful things that they do. I'm a very proud Mommy and who doesn't enjoy stories and/or pictures about another person's kids right?

Now onto my first rant for which I will start a new entry.